Tuesday, August 21, 2012
#photoadayAUG
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Snow White and the Huntsman
¡Spoiler Alert!
If you haven't seen the movie, I talk about several parts of the movie.
This depiction of the Snow White fairy tale had a spiritual parallel to me. I was reminded of what john Elderedge was talking about in Waking The Dead in the section about myths. How they speak to our hearts because things are not as they seem here on earth. Each story or movie speaks something different. Not all stories are written to the same person. Not every story is going to speak to every person. This story is not an epic tale or journey. There are epic parts, but it is a fairy tale. There are many versions of the Snow White tale and this is just one of them.
Before Snow White eats the apple, she is timid and unsure of who she is. She didn't believe she had a role to play or that she had an important role to play. When true love touched her, her heart woke up. She saw her part. "I know that fire burns in all of you. The embers must grow. I will be your weapon. I’d rather die today then live another day in this death. And who will ride with me? Who will be my brothers?" She is done with the dark and the evil that is over the kingdom. She is ready to bring the light. “I’ve seen what she sees, I know what she knows. I can kill her.”
When we all allow the Father's love, the true love, touch our heart something awakens. We believe. We believe in ourselves. We believe in the cause. We stop seeing through our eyes and with our experiences, but see with His eyes and His heart.
The warrior heart, the beauty, inside of a woman is different and looks different than the warrior heart of a man. We don't often see it because tradition teaches that the man is the warrior. That the woman is the lesser sex. But we are to compliment each other. God created male and female, each in His own image. Many times, and it comes out in the movie, a person's warrior spirit will bring out the spirit in another person. Snow White's beauty and innocence called out the good, strong, warrior heart of the Huntsman. And the profound statement that Snow White makes to the evil queen as she is dying: "You can't have my heart."
The question is What does it stir in you? It stirred something different in me then it did in Mom. It struck her that "Only by fairest blood it can be undone."
Did it stir anything in you?
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Quarter of a Century
Ever had one of those moments when you could see life so clearly? Just like standing on a mountain on a clear, beautiful Pacific Northwest day and being able to see the landscape lying out below. Or like at the top of the Tower of Terror, when the doors open and you can see all of DisneyWorld. There is seriously nothing better in life. I had one of those days two weeks ago. Actually, it was a whole week. My birthday was coming, but not just any birthday. My 25th birthday. I had kinda been dreading it cause a couple of my friends struggled with turning 25. The week before my birthday came and bam, I was feeling really good.
25. A quarter of a century. I'm really not having an issue with this age. Not yet anyways. :) Actually something clicked in my brain. It was a combination of a few things, not just my birthday.
First, we ended a three week Daniel fast and I had fasted caffeine for seven weeks. So it was a pretty intense time spiritually. A time of, once again, learning to die to myself, allowing the Father to be in control of my life, my decisions and my thoughts.
Second, was the radio. Doesn't sound like some deep thing, but it totally changed things. We got a new Christian radio station, 88.1 Air1. They play Christian alternative so artists like Skillet, Sanctus Real, Thousand Foot Krutch, etc. I stopped listening to Christian radio because I couldn't stand Spirit 105.3. It's not a bad station, it just didn't relate to me. Not going to call in the family name game to get tickets to see see Sesame Street live or the Wiggles. And I still knew most of the songs even if I hadn't listened in a year. I seriously like Air1. Their songs are loud, upbeat and alternative. There was finally a Christian radio station I could stand to listen to. One song in particular spoke to me real deep: Afterlife by Switchfoot.
I've tasted fire I'm ready to come alive/I can't just shut it up and fake that I'm alright/I'm ready now/I'm not waiting for the afterlife
Last was my birthday. :)
Why wait to live? Wait for what? A better job? A different time or place in life? A better tomorrow? The phone to ring or the snow to snow or waiting around for a yes or a no or a string of pearls or a pair of pants or a wig with curls or Another Chance?
What am I waiting for? Another 25 years? There are things I want to do, but haven't. Sorta like a bucket list. Why? Fear? Well partially that and lack of funds. :P So I decided to start somewhere. I died chunks of my hair purple.
What do you want to do?
What are you waiting for?
Thursday, July 28, 2011
The closing of one door
In April an opportunity opened for me to become the director of a child care center. It was a dream I had waited for. Four months after the doors opened they closed. We had gone from 8 children enrolled to 2. We had posted and passed out flyers. We had talked to people at the park, walking down the street as well as friends and family. Nothing was bringing the kids in. With 2 children we just couldn't afford to keep the doors opened. We gave the parents the option to put their children in our sister center. Which is where I am now working again.
So life took a turn that I was not expecting. I'm really not sure where I am going now or what I am doing. It's an exciting and scary place to be. This past week I've bawled my eyes out, had an "I don't even care, whatever attitude and been really excited for what's next. There have been overwhelming times and sit back and think times. The song Sing Me A Love Song by BarlowGirl really spoke to me the other day. This time has forced me to run into the arms of Jesus since my usual security blanket is in Romania (that would be my mom). I guess this is another learning to trust Jesus time. Sigh, I thought I had learned this already. :P Maybe this time it will stick.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Three Days
I wish I could say that my attitude has been amazingly transformed since I started this new habit of junking out on music, but not exactly. I still want chocolate, I'm still an emotional wreck, but I also want more of Jesus. Much more. I feel this fast is going to be a time of deepening my relationship with Him. Taking it to the next level. Embracing whatever that looks like.
I was challenged today as I read Daniel 1 and jotted down some thoughts.
Daniel 1:8 "But Daniel was determined not to defile himself by eating the food and wine given to them by the king. He asked the chief of staff for permission not to eat these unacceptable foods."
Other versions say he resolved, made up his mind not to defile himself. Not only was he determined not to defile himself, but also to keep God first in his life, even though his life had dramatically changed. He was determined to follow, honor, please and serve God no what what happened in his life. So no matter what is going on in my life, communication break downs or long hours, I am determined to follow God.
As I struggled this morning two songs played on the radio that spoke to me:
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Forever
God is at the very core of their marriage. Everything they do flows around their central faith. They purposed to do things together. If one of them didn't like the activity, they found a way to like it. Now, after knowing each other for 55 years, they like everything they do together. They have gone on adventures together. This couple travels so much. To Israel, a cruise in Panama, they are going on a Russian cruise, all over the US and beyond. They love people. That was evident in the amount of people that showed up and the places they had met them. From being next door neighbors to their ski club, hiking group, Church, Crimson Bridge, and various other ministries they serve in. I have been so blessed to have grown up around these two amazing people. They have watched me grow up, have prayed over my life and spoken words of wisdom into my heart.
My life is filled with inspirational marriages. Papa David and Mima Janet will have their 50th this October, Gram Carol and Grandpa Chuck would have been married 50 years last June, my parents have been married 27 years and the list could go on. Among the friends in my community and the friends we caught up with at the pa
rty there are marriages that are so strong in God and they are so in love with each other. In this day where marriage is viewed as disposable it is refreshing to see people who live by the "To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do us part" vows said at the alter. It fills my heart with joy as I look at the cloud of witnesses I have before me. It gives me hope as I patiently wait for my future man.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Dusty Memories
Now don't get me wrong. I love to dance. I dance around the house to my music, I dance with the kids at work, I dance with the Wii, heck I even dance when I'm cleaning the bathroom or the kitchen. But it has been a while since I danced with and for Jesus. I used to dance all the time for Him. Every church service, every time worship music was on, at conferences or retreats and during outreaches. Dancing was a part of my worship. God felt so close when I danced.
When did that change? Well, I can't give the exact date. It was a slow fade and there were a few triggers. People at the church I was attending then became uncomfortable with dancing and the streamers. The worship leader on several occasions asked me to come to the front while I was worshiping. Too many people were watching me worship, I felt like a distraction. I felt uncomfortable. Dancing is a way I express my love, joy and adoration to God, but it began to feel like a performance rather than true worship. So slowly dancing faded out of my corporate worship then out of my personal worship. Dust began to fall.
Will I dust off my dancing shoes? I don't know at this point. I guess first I will have to locate my streamers and dust them off.
Tuesday, November 03, 2009
My Journey
I grew up in Christian home and in Church. Asked God in when I was about 3 years old. There was a program at church called Missionettes that we were involved with. As I moved up through the classes there were women that invested into my life, but the knowledge that I gained was mainly head knowledge. I learned a ton of memory verses, read the Bible, and did numerous studies although most of it didn’t penetrate to my heart.
July 1995 – I fell from a Class A motor home front captains seat while it was traveling about 25 miles per hour. The fall resulted in a skull fracture over my right ear. The skull fracture severed a small artery on my brain causing a blood clot to form. Emergency surgery by an outstanding neurosurgeon followed. Removal of the blood clot and repairing the skull fracture, with two metal plates and eight screws, were accomplished. Looking back this has showed me God’s hand in my life and serves as a reminder that God has big plans for me. This is more of a screw of remembrance, rather than a stone. ;) The whole story, which is quite lengthy, written by my mom can be read here: http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AVsUZhqJXlo0ZGdqN2doZDRfMGdiZDluNnE0&hl=en
God began to work on my dreams for the future about when I was in the 6th grade. My mom, older sister, and I were on our way home from a mid-week church service. They had listened to a guy who works with teenagers that are living on the streets of
On June 1, 2000 my parents gave me a purity ring to be a reminder to me of the promise I had made to them and my future husband to wait for him and to trust God with my future. One day that ring will be replaced by another to signify my lifelong commitment to my husband.
All through growing up I had a very child like faith in God. I went to church because my parents did. Don’t get me wrong, I loved God and served God, but it was on the coat tails of my parents. After I was crowned an Honor Star through Missionettes in 2000, I tried youth group and found it wasn’t a good fit for me. There wasn’t a clique that I fit into so I felt like an outsider. I started helping in the 2 & 3 year olds classroom in Wednesday nights. That was an instrumental time for me in the process of figuring out what direction I was heading. I loved working with the younger children and watching them develop.
During high school I turned a cold shoulder to the plans God had for my life. Reading my Bible had become a chore. For a period of about three years I closed my heart and my ears to what God had to say. I was doing what I wanted to do. I knew where I was going in life, but once I knew, I took control of how I would get there and who was coming with me. I entered a dating relationship against my parents and mentors better judgment and crammed life full of things to drown out the prick and the deep cry of my heart. On the outside it looked as if I was doing all the right things. I continued to go to church, do summer mission trips, and attend
September 14, 2006 was the first day of my
The last Sunday of outreach, February 25, 2007, during worship I declared that I trusted God to have control of my future and I gave Him my relationship with my boyfriend, which I ended in April because God showed me it was the best plan He had for me. I felt such a wonderful feeling of freedom after that and during our performance at the church I had so much fun dancing under the new freedom I had found. At that moment I was able to let go of everything I was holding onto. Not only did I embrace that Jesus came to save and forgive me, but he also came that I might have a hope and a future. I wanted something to remember this lesson by. Something I could physically look at everyday and be reminded of what God did in my life. I decided to get my nose pierced as a stone of remembrance (July 2, 2007). Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday/But I realized some bigger dreams of mine ~T.S.
I moved to
When I moved home in October 2007, a new phase of life opened up for me. I started my Bachelor of Arts Degree at The Evergreen State College Tacoma Campus in January 2008. I put my head down and dove right in. My focus was on school and work, that was it. That was my life. As school was winding down this past summer, I had no idea what was next. Shortly after my last class in July 2009 my supervisor at work is took my employee file to the State office to get my official job title changed to Director. There was training for child care directors and owners on August 6th that I took. I was quite shocked when my boss told me about the training and brought up the subject of the job change. Since the summer started, enrollment has been down at work, so I had been a little discouraged because I didn't think working full time would be a possibility, much less being put into a director's position. I will be honest and say that I am a little frustrated because things haven’t been moving as fast as I would like them to since the summer.
I still have no idea what the next few years will hold for me, but I know who is holding them and I am trusting in Him to guide me into His best plan for my life.
Album: My Paper HeartArtist: Francesca Battistelli
At twenty years of age I'm still looking for a dream
A war's already waged for my destiny
But You've already won the battle
And You've got great plans for me
Though I can’t always see
(Chorus)
‘Cause I got a couple dents in my fender
Got a couple rips in my jeans
Try to fit the pieces together
But perfection is my enemy
On my own I'm so clumsy
But on Your shoulders I can see
I'm free to be me
When I was just a girl I thought I had it figured out
My life would turn out right, and I'd make it here somehow
But things don't always come that easy
And sometimes I would doubt
(Chorus)
And you’re free to be you
Sometimes I believe that I can do anything
Yet other times I think I've got nothing good to bring
But You look at my heart and You tell me
That I've got all You seek
And it’s easy to believe
Even though
(Chorus)
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Being Home
God's other plans: So most of you know that I have finished my BA degree from Evergreen and work at a child care center in Tacoma. My supervisor at work is taking my employee file to the State office to get my official job title changed to Director. There is a training for child care directors and owners on August 6th that I am going to take part in. I would not be able to if I had gone with the team. At the time I was praying about going or not, I was confused and even a little angry when I didn't feel like I was to go. I told God: "You better have something good planned because I really want to go!" Well he did! I was quite shocked when my boss told me about the training and brought up the subject of the job change. Since the summer started, enrollment has been down at work, so I have been a little discouraged because I didn't think working full time would be a possibility right now, much less being put into a director's position. But here it is staring at me in the face! It is a little daunting and scary, but I know that it is where Abba wants me to be. I am going to climb into this roller coaster, strap in, and trust God knows what is best!
Saturday, June 13, 2009
The time has come
Saturday, May 23, 2009
So...
Two weeks left of the quarter, so life is busy and semi-stressful. I will get through tho. :)
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Why isn't my face on Facebook!?
So I am now taking a sabadical from Facebook. There will be 10 bajillion notifications when I get on. I used to have a ton of respect for the way Facebook was set up versus MySpace, but they lost a little of my respect because there is no way to get true help from them. I guess if I want to keep up with all my friends, I have to email, text, or call them ALL individually and like I have time for that!
Hopefully Facebook withdrawls are not severe. :)
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Much too young to feel this dang old
I am really looking forward to my time in California this next week. Weather that is slightly warmer and sunnier than it has been here. I will be there with two of my best friends and will get to see a couple other friends while I am there. There will be a lot of chilling, hanging out, walking, and laughing. :) It will be a good break before going back to school.
That is all the thoughts I have for now! I am going to go to bed cause 5:30am is going to come earlier than I want it too.
Love and blessings to you all!
Monday, January 26, 2009
It's the weekend for goodness sakes!
The part that was stuck:
Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda
You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda with me
And he sang as he stowed that jumbuck in his tucker-bag
You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda with me
And...
I can count to 52
Learn my ABC's
Mom will show me how
I can even tie my shoe
Hey just look at me!
I'm a big kid now
(You can Google them to see the whole song if you wish.)
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
The downhill slide.
Please, pray that I do stay focused.
Monday, October 27, 2008
It is week 5 :)
Alright! This is week five of the Fall quarter 2008 which means that I am halfway through the quarter. Yessss! So, I have about 33 weeks left until school is over for me. The countdown is on! Graduation is on June 12th, but I have to finish up 8 credits in the Summer. I am really ready to be done. It has been hard for me to get into the routine and flow of school as well as working part time. So this quarter has been stressful in that way.
Well I gotta get to researching! :D
Thursday, September 11, 2008
What I did this summer...
China July 25-August 9:
A team from the small town of Bonney Lake ventured into new territory this summer as we met up with some friends from China to teach at an English training for teachers. We met at Middle School #2 in Huangyuan, Qinghai, China for two weeks encouraging these English teachers to speak and practice their English with us. In the morning they had structured classes that inclueded The Building Blocks of Engish, Including Media and Literature in Teaching, and Teaching Methodology. In the afternoons they attended a small conversation group and a Culture Class. I was a Conversation group leader. So pretty much I had two groups each day for an hour and 2 minutes and my "job" was to get them to speak... in English. We had a book of activities and games that helped out a lot! We had fun! Obviously we couldn't say much about our beliefs, but you hoped and prayed that an opportunity would present itself in your conversations. My first class there were 4 students and in my second I had 6, but one of the Education Department heads joined my class so I ended up with 7 people. Their Enlish levels ranged from very low to pretty well. In the evenings, after dinner, we had activites that they could come and experience if they wanted. We taught them frisbee and baseball, had a sing-along, remarried Amy and Jesse in a mock wedding, watched "Amazing Grace," and had a basketball competition. As usual the food was amazing! :) I love Chinese food the bestest!!! Tried some new dishes, but all in all I still love it! I gotta learn how to make some things.
Bejing August 9-10:
Mom and I spent the night in Bejing before going on to Romania cause Mom didn't want to spend the night in the airport. Now drop a small town girl into a HUGE city and a five star hotel and she goes crazy! :) Mom was a little embarassed. Hehe.. First the guy who picked us up from the airport came in a shiny, black car. We pull up to the hotel and it is like brand spanking new. They come out and get our luggage for us, open the door, and the attendents stand up when you walk in. They were very helpful and showed us to our room. Wow! Our room was soo cool! Open and airy and sweet! Comfy beds, flat screen tv, nice carpet... it was just sweet! You'll have to check out the pics just to see how sweet. So we chilled for a bit after getting to the hotel then took a walk. We found a mall and looked for something to eat. I wanted Western food, so we went to KFC. We headed to the supermarket to get some water, walked around the mall for a bit, then headed back to the hotel for a rest. This was the only time I ever saw the Olympic Games in English. There was one channel that was showing them in English. Mom read a bit and took a nap. Then we headed out for a longer walk trying to find a park that we passed on the way in and we found it. We walked around that, looked at stuff, and found the Starbucks!!! :) We drank our first Starbucks made drink in two weeks. Aaah. Then we headed back to the supermarket to get some dinner and ice cream. We ate, watched some more Olympics, then went to bed. Got up early for breakfast of eggs, bacon, toast and fruit. Yum! Then it was time to head back to the airport and get back to real life.
Romania August 10-25:
Mom and I got there a day and a half before the other team arrived so we spent it with Andreea who is one of the interpreters that goes with us. We walked around Bucharest, but mainly we spent time with her. We met part of the team at the train station on the 12th and made the 5 hour ride to Sighisoara to mee the rest of the team at Project House. The next morning we started the whole medical side of things by sorting and counting pills! Doc unpacked his medical supplies and got organized. To read about the trip visit http://2008romania.spaces.live.com/ The main reason I went this year was for the relationships that have already with the missionaries and interpreters. I love working with the people and helping fill thier needs don't get me wrong. Andreea has had a hard time this year... no her whole life pretty much has been hard. I mainly went to see her and encourage her.
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
The building blocks of a busy life
Having said that... Crazy thought I had the other day: It has been a year since I broke up with JP. I had a dream, and he was in it, the other night... creeped me out actually.... and I got to thinking about the relationship and the timing of things, and yeah, one year this last weekned (if I remember right). Before anyone asks me.... I am doing great! It was a God thing cause we just weren't right for eachother, so really, I am good. :) That is just part of the random, crazy things that are going through my head as I think about this paper I have to write for tomorrow. :P
Let's just say, I am soo looking forward to the end of the quarter! :) But before that, the King side fam are meeting at the beach in a couple of weekends! yesh! haha.. it was at a King side thing that my default pic was taken. :) Dad's rendition of my picture. My family is so funny. :P haha... I love them.
Okay, so beofere I keep rambling on, I will end this post. Please don't take it as a depressing post.... it really wasn't written as that. It should have the feel of: haha, life is crazy! Here is why mine is crazy! LOL!!
"We all got a little junk in the trunk
And when you're feelin' good as sunk
Remember, everything will be just fine
If I laugh at yours then you'll laugh at mine" (Shedaisy)














